Geek's Got My Back

No, there's no song by that title, but there ought to be.

The story of Postmodern Sass Goes To The U.K. was interrupted on Monday as a result of my having to deal with this undocumented feature of Windows XP:



Seems Sass's computer ingested the Sasser worm.

Please, do take a moment to appreciate the irony.

Now, here's how I've been occupying my time lo these past three days:

• Installed Windows XP. Marvelled that the installation went without incident. Even my Porsche Carrera wallpaper was unaltered.


• Realized I had spoken too soon when above Undocumented Feature began shutting down my computer every five minutes.


• Called Jack.


• Downloaded, installed, updated, and ran Microsoft Anti Spyware, Spybot, and Ad-Aware. Twice, each, for good measure. Cleaned up a lot of shit I didn't know was there, yet still the Undocumented Feature reappeared.


• Called Jack. Ranted about Microsoft.


• Considered re-installing DOS 5. Yes, I still have the disks.


• Remembered I no longer have a 5 1/4" floppy drive.


• Called Jack.


• Considered re-formatting C: drive.


• Bought, installed, updated, and ran McAfee Virus Scan 9.0. It found nothing.


• Tried to write. Undocumented Feature reappeared.


• Went to The Banknote. Had the pasta pescatore. And a couple of beers. Appreciated the addition of a Beck's tap.


• Called Jack.


• Downloaded, installed, and ran Microsoft Windows Malicious Software Removal Tool.

I've been online now for about twenty minutes and so far, knock wood, there's been no sign of the Undocumented Feature.

There are advantages to having the Biggest Ass at Big Ass American Software Company have your back.

Besides, I love it when he talks nerdy to me.