Do Wah Diddy Diddy

Well I'm hers! (I'm hers)

She's mine! (she's mine)



Finally, Gentle Reader, Beauty is where she belongs. With her Auntie Sass, where Jack wanted her to be.

And all it took was nine weeks of sleepless nights, one private investigator, one skeezy auction house, two bartenders, two incompetent case investigators, one friendly landlady, one sympathetic neighbour, six incredible friends, $5,000 in cash, one lawyer, one awesome BMW broker, a really swell guy named Aaron (at the skeezy auction house), three understanding colleagues, one sympathetic sound designer (oddly enough), and a truckload of Internet karma — to defeat one evil bastard son of a bitch asshole brother.

At least now I understand why Jack moved so far away from his family, and why he never wanted me to get close to them.

Just look at the indignity they suffered upon his most prized and beloved possession.

It pains me to show you that photo, Gentle Reader, but I wanted you to understand what she's been through. But she's safe, now. Beauty is safe. She just arrived at her new car doctor's, in San Mateo. She'll need to spend a few days there, kind of like a visit to the spa. And when she's recovered, we're going to ride off into the empyrean sunset together, toward Half Moon Bay.